Jack J

"Love the jalapeño taco"

"Bruno Bear: No known photograph. Legend has it, he once hung the possum upside down for 'messing with his dope bong'. Says dope a lot. Never showers. Will probably kill you. Predators: Heroine."

"The Froot Loops Fox: Often seen spending his time out of the enclosed habitat, downstairs on the patio. Prefers gummy bear to Bruno bear. Has occasional fits of hyperactivity. Predator: Bruno Bear."

"2. The Limping Possum: Calm, yet this creature creeps up on you like a jackal. He's recognized by his unique limp and ability to not move from one place for hours. Loves EDM. Predators: Bruno Bear."

"1. The East Coast Giraffe: Seen often in boxers and a tight white tee and/or a suit. This corporate slave is also a slave to his fitness. Predator: Bruno Bear. Weakness: Sleep & Greer & Queer"

"An unusual habitat where carnivores of different civilizations have settled. Along with the main attraction, Bruno Bear, this zoo also shelters three other unique species:-"